The "E" Word...

What is the difference between a dolphin and a shark? This is a picture of a fellow I feared running into every time i was in dark beach water. Even in lake water where I couldn't see below the surface, I was sure there was something slimy that was going to attack me (could have been related to seeing my friends covered with leeches after diving into a lake on a church camping trip - definitely nightmare material).

So, why didn't I think about happy, jumping dolphins instead of sharks? Fear. Sharks will eat me. Dolphins just jump, play, and swim away.

By now you may be wondering what "E" word has to do with either of these swimming images. Both were images I read about in "Conspiracy of Kindness: A Unique Approach to Sharing the Love of Jesus" by Steve Sjogren. Being a part of a church brings the opportunity of developing relationships, if you take the time to get to know the people sitting around you. The challenge in developing relationships in church is that I didn't anticipate "sharks". I thought the church was a place where people went to share the love of Jesus and tell nice stories. To be fair to the author, he is describing the "emotionally edgy" word - evangelism. "Sharing the gospel", the "Good News", is something that seems to me a topic that would bring joy, peace, and happiness. Instead, I ran into people wanting something from me that I wasn't sure I was ready to give because I didn't understand why I was being asked to give it. I wanted a relationship with a loving God. Many times I ran into angry, hurting, needy people. And I stayed, because I felt God might be able to use me to show God's love to others.

At the church there was information about a good place called "heaven" and a bad place called "hell", and I definitely preferred the former to the latter. There were rules to follow and actions to be performed to become a part of the group. My parents told me it was a good place to make friends who were good people. They even drove me, my brother, and my sister to the church every Sunday. They didn't just drop us off, they actually got out of the car with us, went inside, listened, and participated.

I made friends and heard nice stories, but eventually (another "e" word), this place of love and nice stories started to fall apart. Some people got upset about something (nobody told me what it was) and soon the preacher was gone and people left - to start another church. This process happened more than once in my early church years. I hear it continues in churches today.

I have survived my church experiences because I still believe the church is a good place where there are good people with good intentions. I still believe in a good God. However, the word "church" indicates a gathering of people. Wherever people gather, for whatever reason, there is a possibility of pain. Experiencing that pain and focusing on the hurt can create division, or it can just be a diversion, a diversion that God uses to help me grow in my relationship with God. 

I intend to use this blog to write about my experiences with people in the church over the years that challenged me. Some challenged me to grow. Some challenged me to go. I would like to hear from you if that would encourage you to grow closer to God. There are many stories to share. Just like the Bible, some are good, and some are scary. The "good" book is the backbone of many good places with many good people.

Discipleship Pathway - New Book

This is the cover of the most recent book written by Nelson Roth. The book introduces two tried and proven tools to be a disciple and to be a disciple maker. The coaching approach to discipleship made a difference in my life and in my relating to God. 

Finding the NEXT STEP in growing in a  relationship to God is a challenge for many
people. There just doesn't seem to be enough hours in a day. However, using a coach and working with a tool called The Relevant Discipleship Manual, I found time. Time to read. Time to reflect. Time to have the privilege of working with Nelson as my Discipleship Coach.

I found Nelson and his wife Pam when looking for CEUs to maintain my ICF coaching credentials. As part of the training, students in the online class were given the option of using the Relevant Discipleship Manual, authored by Nelson and Pam, as a tool for a one-to-one coaching process. The manual covers seven spiritual disciplines. There are four 2-page articles related to each discipline. There are also an additional two pages of coaching tools for each discipline that will take each of the seven disciplines deeper through the use of powerful questions. 

The manual also has 12 additional lessons that can be used in small groups or Sunday School classes. 

Here is my review of my experience of one-to-one coaching. Nelson and I talked for approximately an hour every two to three weeks. The disciplines were picked by what I wanted to focus on. Each time it seemed like there was a relevant reason I was given the opportunity to focus on that particular discipline. The first one I chose was evangelism - because I am not that good at sharing my faith with others outside of the church. I needed guidance to make the extra effort to remember and share stories of God's activity in my daily life.

I hope you will pick up a copy of this book, and the Relevant Discipleship Manual. I am currently discipling two people through the manual, and have already asked another individual to let me know when they are ready to begin!